when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
