It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Randomize
