we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
