yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
it was like his penis was on wheels.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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