There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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