as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
