I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
