Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
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