Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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