This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
25 True Facts That Sound Fake AF
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
27 Hairstyles That Always Come With A Matching Personality
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT