i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
