does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
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