I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
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