I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
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