I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize