So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
