that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
