Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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