After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize