Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
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