i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Randomize
