my vag is so smooth its legendary
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Randomize
