I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Randomize