nut hugger
A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Randomize
