I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Someone came in the potted fern
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
