Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
