I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
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look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
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