Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
