Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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