It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Randomize
