I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Randomize
