It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
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