I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize