I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
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whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
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