Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Randomize