I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
