Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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