I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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