the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
