I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
