Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
