Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
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Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
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Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
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