I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
