How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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