if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
