dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
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