That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
