Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
