He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
