I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
