ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
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