It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Then you guys just all showered together...?
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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